I was traumatised by my first birth experience and four years on I was pregnant with my second baby. To prepare myself for this I had a private birthing debrief after an unsuccessful debrief with my doctor. I also moved hospital to a world-class London maternity hospital and elected to have a caesarian birth in the hope I could control as much of the birth that I could and be confident in the team around me. One large part of that was working with Anna whose hypnobirthing helped get me in the right mental space for a positive birth outcome.

Myself and my husband utilised the techniques Anna taught us in the lead up to the birth. She also helped us write our birth plan and raised points we would never have considered or thought possible in a caesarian birth. We were also extremely fortunate that our consultant and hospital in general were supportive of our wishes.

The morning of the operation we were excited to meet our baby we were first on the list so when we arrived we went straight in and put our scrubs on, my husband had larger scrubs so that he could do some skin to skin in theatre. The doctor and anaesthetist visited us to ask a few questions and answer any questions we had. We then walked into theatre.

When I arrived the anaesthetist said Mum is special and doesn’t need to wear a mask and hat which was great as I find the masks quite suffocating and the hat kept slipping off! He then talked me through how the epidural would work and how they give both a spinal block and an epidural as they can top up the epidural if the surgery goes on or if I need pain relief after. My husband sat in front of me whilst I had the epidural put in and he was playing our birthing playlist that we had spent time making.

I put some aromatherapy oils on my pulse points ahead of going in to help calm me. It was the same massage oil my husband had used to give me a back massage most evenings so I really associated it with relaxation.

The cannula was in my non-dominant hand and heart monitors were on my back not to interfere with skin to skin. I lay down on the operating table which was tilted to the left and the drapes went up. My husband sat on my left and I could hear the music throughout and speak to him. The anaesthetist and nurse were by my head talking to me telling me what was going on or generally reassuring me.

The birth itself was quick, some tugs and rummaging and suddenly baby was here. The surgeon performed a gentle c section which slows down the whole process and helps baby adjust better to the birth. They also carried out delayed cord clamping.

The bit that felt like an eternity was post birth sewing me up etc. and I could also feel a lot of movement and tugging. Whilst the surgeon finished up I lay with baby Margaux on my chest.

It was a much better experience than my first I felt a surge of love wash over me as she was born and felt an instant connection to her which I hadn’t felt before. Having the information and opportunity to own my birth experience this time really helped give me the birth I needed and wanted.