When I talk about this birth it’s impossible not to mention my first birth, as that influenced this one so much. I gave birth in 2019 to my daughter Liv, and had a huge birth trauma after. I had every intervention under the sun with pessary, gel, 7 sweeps, drip and all the works - and of course ended up with an unplanned c section after 35+ hours. It took me 3 years to work through the PTSD and trauma caused by it.

This pregnancy was uneventful but a true battle - I changed hospital early on as I felt unsupported in my wish for a VBAC at home, and found the most amazing midwife in another hospital. She is the head of homebirth there and was happy to caseload although I was outside their catchment area - she just said she wouldn’t be able to come out to me in labour sadly. We made a plan that I would self refer to the hospital closest to us - sadly where we had had our birth trauma 3 years earlier - and that they would be the ones coming out in labour, but that I would see her up until that point.

I had been in prodromal labour since 35 weeks and had constant start and stop each night. I had used the Freya app but after a couple of weeks I gave up as it kept saying I was in established labour when I clearly wasn’t

My due date came and went and I started feeling a bit tense. I went for acupuncture over the weekend at 40+6 and felt great afterwards. I had been losing my mucus plug gradually during the past days, and had constant Braxton hicks.

On the Monday I was 41+0 and felt very emotional. I kept crying for everything, even the tiniest thing set me off. Suddenly I felt really unprepared for birth and ran out to get candles to put up in our birth space. I carried 2 heavy bags all the way home and felt a bit sore in my lower back.
The evening came and we had dinner and I felt like the braxton hicks wouldn’t stop. I told my partner I was going to have a shower whilst he put our daughter to bed. Before I got into the shower I had this weird thought and texted him asking if he thought I could be in labour

I spent a good half an hour in the shower, and after a while I realised I was standing in weird positions, like I kept bending my legs and feet and standing on my toes. I remember I had seen something similar in a post by Eva Rose Birth on Instagram when a woman was in labour, and I suddenly got this thought that I should get out of the shower!

I went upstairs and crawled into bed with my partner and my daughter and as I laid down I heard a huge pop! And my waters went all over the bed!
15 seconds later the first surge came and it blew my mind - it was fast and furious and so my partner called in only to hear that there was no one on call that night, we “had to come in”. He said we’re not moving and that I was a VBAC, and that things were ramping up and that they had to send someone. He kept being told no so we eventually just said we’ll be in touch. No one ever phoned us back to check in how things were going.

We phoned our doula and when she arrived I got into the pool which felt great, but my surges were really intense so I felt I wanted to keep moving, so I kept going in and out of the pool, using the TENS when I walked around and getting some counter pressure from my doula which was great. Our 3yo daughter had stayed awake with us in the living room, busy watching Paw Patrol and couldn’t be bothered about me walking around mooing (she eventually went to sleep at midnight and slept through the birth of her brother).

My memory is not the best as we didn’t time anything, but I think at around 1 am my body started to involuntarily push and it started to get quite difficult to focus. I went into the pool and things slowed down - my doula said this was probably the rest and be thankful phase and that I could have a breather now - which was great as I felt tired. I eventually felt like I wanted to get on with it and got out and things ramped up again. Here it’s sort of a blur, but I remember not long after feeling like I absolutely couldn’t do it anymore - I begged my partner to take me to the hospital for a c-section ( thank god he said no), I said the pain was too much, and that “I’ve changed my mind and I don’t want him coming out anymore, he has to stay in”.

All the time my partner and doula reminded me of relaxing and breathing. I felt initially that the surges were crashing over me, but once I managed to really focus on my breathing I started to ride the waves rather than being under them.

I felt the baby move down and said to my partner that he was coming. I must give my partner so much credit - he was so calm and confident. He put the phone on video recording, he put some gloves on, adjusted the inco pads on the floor and guided me through it. It’s weird, we had this calm conversation during the moment my son was crowning, and I just can’t remember a word of it.

Our Aldo was born at 2:44 am and came out in two pushes next to the sofa and as he came out I remember I looked onto the photo we have hanging on the wall of my daughters birth.

It sounds a bit stupid perhaps, but as he came out I felt like all the trauma I had had from my past birth, came out along him. It was like a cleanse. Now when I think back on my daughters birth I don’t feel any trauma anymore, it’s just gone.

Our doula missed the birth as she was phoning the paramedics! They came within minutes and were super gentle - we waited for white with the cord and I then went to the toilet and the placenta came out on its own. We had to go in as no midwives available to come out to do the checks, but that felt absolutely fine. I had a small tear in my urethra that they quickly stitched, and a vaginal graze that they just left.

It’s now been 3 months and I feel so proud, and thankful.

Hypnobirthing really helped me from the get go: taking the HH course made us feel confident and calm in our choice for our homebirth, and made us trust our instincts as well as having evidence based facts to successfully achieve our VBAC at home. During pregnancy I listened to the relaxation recordings almost daily, and worked with affirmations as well as visualisation.

The breathing techniques really helped me to ride the waves and feel calm during an otherwise quite intense, speedy birth! I breathed Aldo out and trust my intuition in my body pushing him out on it’s own. I really recommend anyone taking the Hypnobirthing course as it really fills you up with confidence, facts and lots of oxytocin!